I see a lot of discussion amongst entrepreneurial women, of dealing with impostor syndrome and challenging fears.
Whether it be fear of visibility, wondering what friends and family will think, fear of failure…even fear of success.
I have written in the past that I sometimes think it’s (at least in part) due to the societal pressures of modesty women are expected to uphold.
Not the sum of who we are
However we were raised and groomed (while part of our history), is not the sum of who we are. We may even gauge our own self worth heavily on how happy we can make other people, completely forgetting ourselves.
Even if we believe in ourselves deep down and hold desires for the life we dream of, old thought patterns are hard to shake.
How dare we seek fulfillment in something outside of our pre-defined roles. How dare we promote our expertise and step up and shine. How dare we talk proudly about what we do, what our credentials are and why we’re the best in our field. How dare we own our badassery and seek to empower others to do the same.
That’s just bragging and showing off, right? Even if you are the best at what you do, you’re not “supposed” to say so.
But you try anyway, and then all these weird feelings come up. What if that colleague who has written 3 bestselling books sees you claiming to be an “expert” in the same field? Surely you’ll look like a fraud…
Perceived expectations
If you’ve ever felt guilt or fear over pursuing a dream for one reason or another, ask yourself what perceived expectations (your own or someone else’s) may be the block.
Whatever it is, it holds you back even when you want to move forward.
And of course, feeling immobilized by something you can’t even quite put your finger on only serves to make you feel more inept. The good news is, you’re really not. And with some deep introspection or time invested in some excellent coaching, you’ll discover that block and a way to move past it.
You have the control
All of this is surmountable once you realize you have the control, which you do.
The fear isn’t going to magically go away. All of us have it. It’s what you do despite it that matters.
Getting past it takes some work, and possibly some de-programming, if you’re stuck on some old ways of thinking no longer serve you.
You are worth it.
You’re not going to wake up one day to find that the fear is gone. You are human, and some degree of fear will always be there.
The trick isn’t figuring out how to get rid of the fear. It’s in figuring out how to push past it and go after the life you want despite it. You can let it weigh you down or you can power through, but you have the control over which of those two options you choose.
You lack nothing
Everything you need to launch your passions is already in you.
That doesn’t mean it’s going to be simple, or easy, or failproof. It doesn’t mean you’ll be protected from the people who get a kick out of making you feel small. It doesn’t mean it can happen overnight.
All it means is, the next step is up to you. Yes, it’s tough. Yes it might be a long road. Yes, there may be failures along the way to your success. But it’s doable IF you believe it is.
Impostor syndrome? Life’s too short.
You lack nothing.
Have you dared to pursue a dream despite fears or Impostor Syndrome cropping up in the back of your mind? Please share your experience in the comments to inspire others.
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